You know you’ve lived in Taiwan too long when...

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A few years ago, it was popular to make lists with answers to: "you know you have lived too long in Taiwan when..." and I never got around to making one until now. So here is a recent, up to date, modern list of items to tell if you have lived too long in Taiwan. 

1. Wearing slippers outside
2. Wear a helmet into 7-11
3. Prefer doujiang to milk
4. Driving a scooter is the main mode of transport
5. Complaining about air quality is cliché, You don’t care about complaining about the bad air pollution anymore
6. The air drills remind you that you’ve lived here one year longer
7. 7-11 has become your second home.
8. You realize the DPP and KMT are both the same party run by the mafia
9. You start deflecting compliments
10. Night markets are life
11. You get scared when you see other foreigners
12. You feel safe walking in downtown at midnight
13. You are willing to let your boss yell at you, and you still continue to brown nose as long as you get that year end bonus
14. You use Line more than Facebook messenger or texting
15. You are excited for Typhoon day
16. 10 degrees Celsius feels like minus 20.
17. Anything below 26 degrees Celsius is freezing.
18. 35 Degrees Celsius feels just right. 
19. You are excited for May only because of Mango season
20. You must give everything to everyone using two hands
21. You expect people on the street to stare at you
22. You are excited to receive receipts because you know next month you might win the lottery
23. You win the receipt lottery for 200 NT for the fourth time...
24. You are seriously contemplating trading in your APRC for citizenship by giving up citizenship to your home country
25. Somehow you are still in Taiwan while foreigners have been banned from entry for nearly three years because of COVID
26. You feel uncomfortable not wearing a mask anywhere
27. You no longer complain about Work and School makeup day on Saturday. You are happy to get the extra holiday for a long weekend instead.
28. You stop complaining about traffic, pollution, and weather.
29. You no longer care if someone is not wearing a helmet while riding a scooter.
30. You are asking people for warm water on a hot sunny day.
31. You have random cravings for stinky tofu. 
32. You have been pulled over for a traffic violation, and the cop does not let you go because you are a foreigner.
33. You start to follow the personal lives of Taiwanese celebreties.
34. You start to follow Taiwanese baseball.
35. You root for Taiwan in the Olympics more than your home country.
36. You have given up on following any sports in your home country.
37. You prefer Heisong Sarsaparilla to Root Beer.
38. You are glad you do not have to take care of a back yard. 
39. You are surprised when you see a house with a patch of grass in front of it.
40. You can't wait for quarantine rules to end.
41. Your own parents have not seen your two year old child.
42. You have forgotten so many words in English that you must speak in Chinglish.
43. You have forgotten how to speak English entirely.
44. You write a Chinese character with your finger in your other hand to someone to explain a word.
45. Whenever you pick up the phone, you answer "wei 唯."
46. When buying biandang, you no longer have to point and say "zhege 這個." You know the names of some side dishes.
47. You can read more than just your favorite food on a Chinese menu.
48. You understand that Taiwan is an independent country.
49. You follow Taiwanese politics closer than politics in your home country. 
50. You secretly wish you could run for office and become the first foreigner president of Taiwan.
51. You would join the Taiwanese army to defend the country in the event of a Chinese attack on Taiwan. 
52. You call everyone "Laoban" and "Shuaige."
53. A 6.0 earthquake is small to you. 
54. You make fun of other foreigners who are freaking out about the earthquake.
55. You hate nothing more than waiting for red lights in Taipei.
56. You talk with your Taiwanese friends about your horoscope.
57. You ask your Taiwanese friends what their blood type is.
58. When you see a stroller on the street, you expect there to be a dog inside.
59. You are no longer phased by the many Taiwanese mountain dogs that roam unleashed in the mountains on your hike/bike ride.
60. You keep the Aircon at 23 Degrees Celsius.
61. You can't wait to charge your Easy Card with all the 1 NT coins you have collected.
62. You enjoy  visiting claw machine parlors as a way to relax, even if you lose.
63. You pay four times the price for products that you miss from your home country.
64. You have thought about starting up a trading company to import all the products you miss from your home country.
65. You have thought about running a night market stall with all the products you miss from your home country.
66. You actually do start a business importing products from your home country.
67. Your friends are always sending you messages asking you to translate something.
68. You no longer blush when someone complements your Chinese.
69. You are excited to get your tax refund in May.
70. You begin to fight your friends to pay the bill first.
71.  You begin to like the taste of Durian.
72. You have rounded the island on bicycle without skipping the part between Hualien and Taitung.
73. You have thought about dyeing your hair black to fit in. 
74. You know the current water levels for all major reservoirs in Taiwan.
75. You are not longer happy it is raining, which will help the reservoirs.
76. You can't remember the last time you've seen the sun. 
77. You memorized the names of all indigenous birds in Taiwan.
78. You have memorized the names of all the major 100 peaks in Taiwan. 
79. When someone asks which country you are from, you hesitate because you have forgotten yourself.
80. You have stayed overnight in every county in Taiwan.
81. You have tried betel nut.
82. You can't wait to have a barbeque on mid-autumn festival.
83. You are afraid of receiving gifts from your coworkers because it means you must give something in return.
84.  You know that Costco actually opens an hour early on weekends, and you are always the first in line. 
85. You no longer stop and stare at giant banana spiders.
86. You have five different type of roach killer stored under your sink.
87. You are happy when you see a gecko climbing on your wall inside your house. 
88. You only ever visit one fruit/vegetable stand.
89. The 7-11 employees near your house have memorized your name and phone number.
90. You are a gold shrimp on Shoppee.
91. You receive non-stop spam texts in Chinese.
92. You have clicked on POPCAT more times than is reasonable.
93. You are happy when there is a sunny day so your clothes will dry faster.
94. You are perfectly content washing all dishes by hand.
95. The only oven in your house is a small toaster oven.
96. The most often used appliance in your house is a Datong Electric Pot (大同電鍋).
97. You have a humidifier running 24/7 in your house during winter.
98. You are surprised to see a foreigner looking back at you every time you look in the mirror.
99. You carry an umbrella or rain gear with you at all times.
100. You prefer tile floors to carpet. 

 
Some other similar lists which were posted a few years ago:
http://intaiwan.intaiwan.net/2014/10/07/you-know-youve-lived-in-taiwan/

https://www.forbes.com/sites/ralphjennings/2016/03/01/five-signs-youve-lived-too-long-in-taiwan/#e706b3e468a6

https://www.taiwannews.com.tw/en/news/3219771

https://tw.forumosa.com/t/you-know-youve-been-in-taiwan-too-long-when/31846/38

https://laorencha.blogspot.com/2014/10/you-know-youve-lived-in-taiwan-too-long.html
​
https://theculturetrip.com/asia/taiwan/articles/you-know-when-youve-been-in-taiwan-a-long-time-when/

​Did we miss anything? Please feel free to leave your answers in the comments here. 

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